I'm so sorry to hear that Dovey. Sorry I don't know of an online space. Maybe see if she will go out to lunch pretty soon. Easy to stay in and be sad during such a time.

I'm sorry to hear that.  Losing a child upsets the natural order of things.  One isn't suppose to outlive a child.

Having lost a baby shortly after birth, I was most appreciative of friends who didn't try to "fix me".  I loved the hugs and kindness- not words of "I know how you feel" [and then proceed to tell me about a miscarriage] or the "it was nature's way" or "you will be able to have another one".   A woman's body goes through a lot in the delivery process and the body is ready for a baby- milk comes in, bodies need to heal- yet, it doesn't understand that there is no baby.  Emotions can run wild and cause physical manifestations as well.

There are support groups and if necessary, there is professional counseling.  It is surprising how many women have lost a baby. She may find strength with others who have experienced that same loss.

A good friend, an understanding husband and time can help heal a lot.

P.S. Another thing to do is to read about the grieving process.  It helps to recognize the steps of grief.

Your idea of a donation honoring her son seems lovely...I think most people would be appreciative, but I agree with you on checking with her first.  Grief can be so personal that some people don't want it publicized.

There's a private web community called Hannah's Prayer Ministries...it's a faith-based group and is for women coping with infertility and loss of children.  (On the www it's hannah.org you you can google Hannah's Prayer).  If she is person of faith (from what i've seen it's fairly conservative Christian), she may find it helpful.  I agree with Meri that professional counseling may also be appropriate (in time).  A lot of private counseling centers have someone who specializes in women's issues and may be able to link her with support groups as well. 

I'm sorry to hear of your friend's loss. What a tough time and it sounds like you are such a caring person and trying to be there for her. Many people pull away from someone who is grieving, but people who are grieving may just want someone to be there. Offering to do specific practical things like helping out with cleaning, yard work, other kids, etc. can be such a help to some who are grieving. After the first few weeks, many people move on with their lives and that's when the reality seems to particularly hit many people. Continuing to be available may be particularly helpful.

Here's an informative website related to hospice that includes quite a bit of information, if you are interested in learning more:

http://www.hospicenet.org/

Hope something here will help.

I am so sorry for your friend.  I have lost four babies due to miscarriage I can't imagine delivering a baby that didn't make it.  I do have four children that are alive and well. 

I hope these sites help. MCM

http://www.stillborn-angels.memory-of.com

http://www.honoredbabies.org/support.htm

oh, thank you everyone. You have given me some places to start. i have never gone through losing a baby, I can only imagine how heartbreaking it must be.