I am a SAHM, but I also own my own business selling Tastefully Simple.  Staying at home has it's pros and cons, and these are mine:

Pros

Free childcare - I can't stand the thought of paying someone else to watch my child when I can stay home with him and provide direct one-on-one, and quite frankly, better care for free.

Safety - Call me paranoid or over-protective, but I don't trust strangers with my son.  I have yet to this day intrusted the help of a stranger to watch my child.  I only rely on friends and family members.  When I move out of the state, I'm screwed :)  Also, my son is not getting exposed to all the colds and flu viruses that are rampant at daycare facilities.

Milestones - Being at home with your child is great because you get to see every little change and witness all the milestones that you might not otherwise be able to see.  I also think it brings a closeness with your child that you wouldn't normally have either.

Cons

Cabin Fever - Even though I belong to a couple "mommy groups" and get out of the house frequently, I still get cabin fever quite often.  Especially in the winter when it isn't nice enough to do things outside.

Conversation - When I worked, my husband and I would come home and have tons to talk about.  Now when my husband comes home, it sometimes feels like there is nothing to talk about besides how his day was.  Quite frankly, your life isn't very exciting as a SAHM, and I sometimes resent not being able to go out and work like my husband is able to. 

I think the biggest advantage is parental bonding, and those little moments that make being a parent wonderful.  Of course there are other benefits but I think that these are primarilly it.  So much growth in a child occurs during the first 4 years of a childs life and if the family could swing it I think being with family is better than allowing someone else to do it.

I'm a SAHM and I love it!

I am pretty paranoid - I don't trust daycare providers. Often times, they hire teenagers or any person off the street. One daycare in my town hires the mentally handicapped - not that I have a problem with that, but I used to work there and the owner would let a severely mentally handicapped woman carry around the little babies! Before I was hired, they were nearly sued because the same woman dropped a baby down the stairs. They were forced to remodel their center so it didn't have stairs. Scary!

It's also so great to see all of your baby's milestones! I've been with my daughter every step of the way. Also, she's only 2 yrs old and she's already doing things that a 4 yr old is supposed to do. I think this is mainly because I'm with her all the time. I talk to her like any other person - no baby talk - and she can say full sentences. I'm positive it's because I stay at home and teach her everyday.

She's not sick as often as other children either. She's only had a few ear infections and colds and that's it. Which is a God Send - it's a challenge to care for a very crabby, sick 2 yr old.

She's not exposed to other children's behaviors - one other 2 yr old I know already says and knows all the "naughty" words because some kid at daycare was gracious enough to teach him.

You know exactly what your child's nutrition is. Depending on how long they would spend at daycare (a few hrs vs. the whole day) your child will probably eat breakfast and lunch there. Generally, the meals are nutritious. But if your child is picky or has food allergies, he/she may not be getting everything they need.

The worst thing about being a SAHM is being cooped up in the house all day with only a baby for company. It gets better as the child grows up, but it's still kind of lonely. It's difficult to take the baby/toddler out by yourself. A baby has so many things to consider (diapers, formula/breast milk, etc) and a toddler can be such a handful especially if they are in a mood. So usually I end up staying home. At least the house gets cleaned!

However, your schedule is pretty wide open, so if a friend or family member calls you up and wants to go shopping or out to lunch, you can go! As long as your friend/family member is willing to help with the kid that is!

I have found that people sometimes avoid asking me shopping or out to lunch though - because I automatically come with a kid and they don't want to deal with it. Those people aren't true friends. So you do find out who your true friends are.

For me, being a SAHM is worth it. After I finish nursing school, my husband is going to go part-time at his job and I'm going to try to find night work or possibly at home work doing care plans or something. That way I can be with my daughter and future babies more.

I was a stay at home Mom, and wouldn't trade anything in the world for the opportunity to do it. My husband and I made a joint decision. I had taken care of my friends little girl, she started calling us Mom & Dad.  We looked at each other and said "We don't want our child to be calling someone else Mom & Dad". So after I had him, that was a choice we made. Back then it was kind of shunned upon, people I felt looked down at me. When I was asked "And what do you do?, I would state I was a SAHM" they were like OH and roll their eyes. Like I was stupid, and knew of nothing that was going on in the world. Fooled them!

Gotta Go! I'll write more later, hubby needs the computer.

They thought I didn't have a brain because I didn't interact with other adults all day. Or that I wouldn't watch the news. I was there for my children and they knew it. For all their firsts, smiles, rollovers, crawling, walking, talking, potty training. No job can be as rewarding as being SAHM. Sure we did without alot of things, but it was worth every smile or boo-boo that needed kissing. I saw them off to school and was home when they came home. Not until my kids were in school full-time did I get a part-time job, that could be flexiable. So I could help at school parties, be there when they didn't feel well. If you are able, don't miss the opportunity because no will take care of your children like you can. And I agree, you can just trust anyone with your children they are too innocent and special. You know how they are treated, with the love and the hugs!

china-cat84 said…

It's also so great to see all of your baby's milestones! I've been with my daughter every step of the way. Also, she's only 2 yrs old and she's already doing things that a 4 yr old is supposed to do. I think this is mainly because I'm with her all the time. I talk to her like any other person - no baby talk - and she can say full sentences. I'm positive it's because I stay at home and teach her everyday.

I have found that people sometimes avoid asking me shopping or out to lunch though - because I automatically come with a kid and they don't want to deal with it. Those people aren't true friends. So you do find out who your true friends are.

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We have friends who both worked outside the home when their child was born, but she's a speech pathologist, and you're absolutely right...no baby talk should be used!  Their daughter was speaking in full sentences with correct grammer months before other kids whose parents used sing-songy voices and made-up words.

I am not surprised to hear you say that some people avoid asking you to go out with them...I took a vacation day and had lunch with two of my friends who are teachers before school started.  We planned to meet at a place that had a children's play area, so we could chit chat a little while the kids played, but even so, they kept apologizing for their kids' little fingers reaching for my food or for having to interrupt me mid-sentence to say something to their little ones.  It didn't bother me in the least, because they're kids...they need adults' attention!  I felt bad that they even felt they needed to apologize for taking care of their babies!  But I know there are people that would be hugely inconvenienced by that...what a shame that you've had friends like that.  Their loss!

I'm a SAHM. I do enjoy it but it does get old. I like that you don't have to rely on someone else looking after your child. After all no one takes care of your stuff (child) like you do. I don't like the thought of my toddler going to a place infested with germs. Especially with swine flu and things like that I'm just more comfortable just having my youngest stay at home with me.Like others have mentioned you get to be there every step of the way. I also like that all my time can be devoted to my kids. Yes, it can drive you crazy especially being in the house most of the day with someone who can't even speak! I'm also CONSTANTLY cleaning up after my little destroyer.But in the end, for now I least, I wouldn't change it. My husband tells me all the time that he doesn't ever want me to get a job again. I love my kids and I'm glad that I'm actually lucky enough to be able to stay at home.

I'm a SAHM and everyone on this thread above me pretty much stated the pros and cons of it.  I feel so blessed to be able to stay home with my kids and the benefits FAR outweigh any negatives.  If your family can swing it, I highly recommend that your husband stay home with your children. 

My children are growing up so fast and I have appreciated (almost - lol) every second of my time spent with them.  My first born just started first grade and I can't believe how fast his first six years have gone by.  I will never regret staying out of the workforce for the past five years so that I could raise my son at home with me.  My daughter will be in full day kindergarten next year and I will then decide if/when I return to the workforce.  The six or so years that I stayed at home are worth every lost penny of income. 

Whatever your family decides, as long as your children have a lot of love at home, they will flourish.  Good luck! 

Thanks so much!  I'm really hoping we'll be able to afford to.  We're hoping he'll be able to get a part-time job that he can do from home, maybe payroll or something like that, so we still have some income (to cover his student loans...LOL!), but he can be our primary caregiver.  Frankly, when I compare childcare costs to wages, it seems comparable!