I'm sorry to hear of your friend's loss. What a tough time and it sounds like you are such a caring person and trying to be there for her. Many people pull away from someone who is grieving, but people who are grieving may just want someone to be there. Offering to do specific practical things like helping out with cleaning, yard work, other kids, etc. can be such a help to some who are grieving. After the first few weeks, many people move on with their lives and that's when the reality seems to particularly hit many people. Continuing to be available may be particularly helpful.

Here's an informative website related to hospice that includes quite a bit of information, if you are interested in learning more:

http://www.hospicenet.org/

Hope something here will help.