Preaching screenwriter here:

Just tried to upgrade from AVG 7.5 to 8.0...big mistake!   Firewall will not load properly after numerous attempts.  All I get is a never ending error message while the tormenting flames of computer hell scorch my tortured soul as legions of nightmarish viral imps mock and taunt me for my impetuous foray into cyber territories unkown.  Oh that I would have heeded the clarion calls from those who are forever ensconced in the fiery depths of cyber hell....delete!!! delete!!! before it is too late!

Alas, I fear all is lost.  Someone, somewhere entreat the God of...