Worst Movies: Worst of the Worst Part 9 Review

 Worst Movies, the Worst of the Worst  now in it's 9th installment  features worthless movies that are not interesting or fun or of any value whatsoever.  If you need a movie to help you stop watching movies watch a few of these terrible wastes of time.

Before I spotlight a half dozen more awful turkeys that you should avoid watching; let me whip through a few dozen lousy movies that you'll be glad you didn't waste your time trying to watch.

Play it as It Lays 1972, Oh Dad Poor Dad, Mama's Hung You in the Closet and I'm Feeling so Sad (1967) Decent play makes a bad movie. , At Long Last Love (1975) Burt Reynolds and Cybil Shepherd sing Cole Poter, a very painful bad idea, Lost Horizon (the musical 1973 version that's worse than a terrible junior high-school play), Jonathan Livingson Seagull, Tidal Wave the Japanese try to do a disaster flick and recruit Lorne Green to shoot some American scenes like they did with Raymond Buff in the American release of Godzilla, Dondi (1961) if Barney is too cynical for you-try this one, The Big Noise (1944) and Atoll K (are the last two movies made by Laurel and Hardy and no matter how much you like L&H you won't like the movies), Boy Did I Get a Wrong Number (1966) The worst of many bad 60s Bob Hope pictures, Che!, The Scicilian, The Ambushers, Amityville 2 The Possession, Amityville Curse just when you thought they had to be done making bad Amityville sequels, they make an even worse one!; Bad Medicine (Steve Gutenberg stars-nuff said), Basic Training Game show host Bert Convy proves why he wasn't in more movies, The Birds 2: Lands End horrible sequel to Hitchcock that wound up premiering on cable, The Blue Lagoon, Return to the Blue Lagoon the first one wasn't bad enough, they had to try again to discourage people from ever going to the movies again. ; Bolero even Bo Derek naked can't help; Bullies,  Cabin BoyChris Elliott is pretty annoying and David Letterman steals the movie with a cameo when he tries to sell a monkey; Cheaper to Keep Her Mac Davis had some country hits and made a few movies. Yikes. Child'Play 2, CHUD, Class of Nuke 'Em High 3: The Good, The Bad and the Subhumanoid (Troma junk), Clifford, The Conqueror, Crazy Fat Ethel 2, Die Laughing, Fire Sale Alan Arkin directs Rob Reiner in a very un-funny comedy. Ghost Dad Cosby tries to make a movie worth seeing. . . nope, Ghost Fever, Hawwmps (the camel comedy), The Island (1980- Michael Caine stars in yet another awful film based on a Peter- Jaws - Benchley book-he should stay away from Water--another bad movie he was in,

The Jazz Singer with Neil Diamond and Laurence Olivier !!!, The Jerky Boys,Joy Sticks, Lipstick, Little Darlings, The Lonely Lady, Maximum Overdrive (Stephen King tried to direct a movie from his own short story about a possessed truck ouch), Monster a go-Go, Night Patrol (the guy formerly known as The Gong Show's unknown comic takes the bag off his head and stars in a lame comedy with Linda The Exorcist Blair - get a big trash bag for all of it), 1990: The Bronx Warriors former Combat star Vic Morrow got convinced to do a bad Mad Max inspired low budget flusher; he then was making Twilight Zone: The Movie and was decapitated in a famous tragic accident.

Norman's Awesome Experience a bad Bill and Ted knock-off., On Deadly Ground How bad can a Stephen Segal film really get? Let him direct and sing in one that tries to have a environmental message--that's how, I'll try to pretend Michael Caine didn't show up to briefly appear in it.  Slugs, Stone Cold, Stroker Ace, Superchick, Tomboy, Under the Rainbow, Vasectomy: A delicate Matter, You Light up My Life, Never Ending Story 2, Meatballs 2, Meatballs 3 , and The MeatEater

 Manos - The Hands of Fate (1966)
Director: Hal P. Warren Starring: Tom Nayman, Diane Mahree, Hal P. Warren, John Reynolds

This has long been known as a terrible movie and was given the "Mystery Science Theater 3000." Treatment.  I will not dispute that.  However even with the MST 3000 treatment you can tell this movie is not just awful on all levels, acting, writing, directing, special effects but it is also very very boring. So don't watch this turkey without the MST 3000 treatment or you'll be very, very sorry. It was shot for about 19,000 dollars on a shakily held 16mm camera. The plot revolves around a family confronted by a satanic cult. There's the Satan character who can't stop laughing, the hounds of hell who look like mangy dogs with big ears glued on them and Torgo the henchman with the really big knee-caps telling us he's working for Satan. Now you know.   

 Moment By Moment (Universal Pictures) 1978 Director: Jane Wagner Starring: John Travolta, Lily Tomlin, Andra Akers, Bert Kramer, Shelley R. Bonus

A pet project of Jane Wagner and Lily Tomlin, this was inspired by And God Created Woman. The roles are reversed. Travolta plays the young sexy male role (named Strip) and Tomlin plays the older woman. There was little chemistry between the actors, the script was a disaster and Travolta begged the studio executives not to release the movie, saying he would do a film for them for free when he had a break in his schedule. Universal didn't listen. The movie died and probably threw Travolta's red-hot career off track. He had flop after flop with the only bright spot the first Look Who's Talking movie until 1990s Pulp Fiction.


Monster Dog (1982)
Alice Cooper proves he's no actor as a leader of a pop group (which never performs???I don't think) whose entourage is terrorized by a vicious German Sheppard whose tail is usually wagging. . Quite bad, and one of those if you insist on seeing it.. you'll be fast forwarding through almost of it... pausing, hearing Alice emote a few lines... nothing really bad, nothing clever either... and then moving on. I actually attended a screening of this thing so I had to watch the whole thing..... Everyone who stayed I the end was rewarded with a some Milk Bones and a chew toy. Ugh.


Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997) Director: John Leonetti Starring: Robin Shou, Talisa Soto, James Remar, Brian Thompson, Lynn "Red" Williams, Irina Pantaeva

Terrible special effects on the level of an old video game are prominently featured in this good vs evil yarn that repeats almost the same identical conflict we saw in the last movie. Bad acting , fight scenes... but dull dull dull.


The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking (1988) Director: Ken Annakin
Starring: Tami Erin, Eileen Brennan, Dennis Dugan, Dianne Hull, Dick Van Patten, George DiCenzo

Since no one seemed excited about The Old Adventures of Pippi, they brought us this thing. Various foreign film versions of Swedish author Astrid Lindgren's popular children's books featuring Pippi Longstocking have never caught on in the U.S. (they were low-budget and poorly dubbed) So in 1988 this new American version was created in hopes that a whole series would follow. There was little interest in this. Pippi is a precocious, red-headed, freckled faced, pigtailed 11 year old brat who is always getting her friends in trouble. She's a free-wheeling, clever, little girl on the page, but in the movie she's loud, obnoxious, annoying grating, selfish, and basically a mean little trouble-maker trying too hard to be cute. Ugh.

More Worst Movies are on their way.  Avoid them.

 Catch up with more Worst Movies to avoid:

Part 11 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Bad-Films-Part-11-review-131f2

Part 10 b is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-10-B-Extra-Bad-Movies-review-c2a30

Part 10 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-10-review-acb66

Part 9 is the one you are reading  now.

Part 8 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-8-review-81bc0

Part 7 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Moviesl-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-7-review-5890

Part 6 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-6-review-cb0f

Part 5 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-5-review-abc02

Part 4 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-4-review-b8604

Part 3 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Movies-Worst-of-the-Worst-review-b0805

Part 2 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/WORST-MOVIES-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-2-review-1e052

Part 1 is here:

http://www.viewpoints.com/WORST-MOVIES-Worst-of-the-Worst-Part-2-review-1e052

You probably would appreciate avoiding these lousy Sports Movies as well.

Worst Sports Movies  Part 3:

http://www.viewpoints.com/WORST-SPORTS-MOVIES-Ever-Part-3-of-3-review-5f8b0

Worst Sports Movies Part 2:

http://www.viewpoints.com/WORST-SPORTS-MOVIES-of-All-Time-Part-2-of-3-review-5e76

Worst Sports Movies Part 1:

http://www.viewpoints.com/Worst-Sports-Movies-of-All-Time-Part-1-of-3-review-7819