The Heroin Diaries- A Year In the Life of a Shattered Rockstar Review

When I was in high school I was a huge Motley Crue fan.  This scared the crap out of my parents who did not understand what interest I could possibly have in dudes with weird makeup and hair.  And they absolutely freaked when they'd hear the all too familiar strains of Shout at the Devil thumping from behind my bedroom door.  That actually was half the fun of being a Crue fan - freaking out of the parental units.

In all honesty, I was a very good kid and they had little to worry about.  What I did not know about the Crue though is the terrible mess the band members had gotten themselves into with regard to drugs, alcohol, and other addictions.  While I was enjoying their music and stressing about flunking Chemistry or whether I'd get my period on a day I had to wear my majorette skirt, the guys in my favorite band were fighting some really bad stuff.

The Heroin Diariesdetails a year in the personal journal of Motley Crue bassist Nikki Sixx.  Nikki was always my favorite Crue member so I was very anxious to read his book when it was released.  I'm very glad that I read it but it was a real eye opener.  I have a bit of an addictive personality so I make a point to steer clear of any addictive substances so I don't know much about drugs.  Although there is a brief glossary in the beginning of the book, I actually had to look up some of the drug terminology in the dictionary which I found hilarious.  It reminded me of that scene in the movie Office Space where the main characters were going to launder money but none of them really knew what that meant so they had to look it up in the dictionary.

Anyway, The Heroin Diaries was very interesting as it gave me an idea of the kinds of things celebrities have to endure and the temptations thrown in their direction.  The book was very graphic at times but so brutally honest and heartbreaking that I could not put it down and ripped thru it in a day or two.  I was totally amazed that Sixx was able to keep a regular journal during this time in his life when he had OD'd once and lived thru it and was in deep depression.  I journal every so often but when I am in a period of depression and anxiety, journaling is the last thing I want to do.  The other thing I found interesting is the running commentary throughout the book.  It was as if the people in Nikki's life were given a copy of the journal and they added notes in the margins to further explain the day's entry or what he or she was thinking at the time.  It added a lot to the story.

I was very surprised to find myself deeply affected by this book.  Although I cannot begin to comprehend the pressures of being a rock star I do understand depression and addictions resulting from unresolved childhood issues.  Things that I'm just now resolving as I approach 40. There were times when I wept with understanding Sixx's family issues and pressure to perform at 110% and getting little in return but the expectation to do more.  There were times when Sixx stated that no one would care if he died and that he is no one when I literally talked aloud to the book and said oh no, people would notice, people would care.  I have been there.  I have also experienced alcoholism with regard to my father so when Sixx described bleeding, pain, and other symptoms of his addiction, it brought me back to recent years of trying to help my dad fight his addiction.

5 stars- I expected The Heroin Diaries to be just a bunch of nonsense and rambling but it was surprisingly interesting and coherent.  My only complaint is that the book is really heavy and not just because of the content.  The pages are thick shiny paper so it weighs like 3 times more than a regular book.  Some of the pages are white, some red, and some black and they all have doodling on them which is super cool, but it's heavy like a textbook so it's not easy to cram it in a purse or bag for carrying around.  Now that I'm thinking about it though, could the heaviness of the book be a symbol of the heaviness of this year in Sixx's life?  Hmmmm, could be.  It's sort of like a modern day Go Ask Alice, only it's true.  And about a guy.