2008 Writer
williampinn
Roseville, CA

Slow-ho-ho and a Bottle of Dumb!

2 star rating

DVD renter.
Pros

    Great FX.

Cons
    Flat Laughs And Repeated Jokes, Hard to follow, Booooring!, Poorly Balanced Tone, Too Many New Plotlines, Characters Not True To The Original, dissapointing ending twist

JUN
1
2008
 

Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb,
This film's so lame I put down my thumb;
As a pirate, Johnny Depp is quite a sight;
Too pretty to be a pirate
And in a sword fight.

There ain't no plot;
There ain't no wenches;
There ain't no rum!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!

Keira Knightly is a Lady who's bored;
So she holds off savages with a single sword;
Not a scratch she gets, killing dozens left and right;
Too bad pretty boy Johnny didn't join the fight.

There ain't no plot;
There ain't no wenches;
There ain't no rum!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!

Orlando Bloom's performance was finer;
Unlike Depp, he wore no eyeliner;
He faced many trials without a scratch;
Though his girl Keira is more than his match.

There ain't no plot;
There ain't no wenches;
There ain't no rum!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!

Action and adventure for kids at best;
For adults it's nothing but a big snoozefest;
Martha Stewart would make a better pirate than Depp;
She wears less makeup and she's not a schlep.

There ain't no plot;
There ain't no wenches;
There ain't no rum!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!
Slow-ho-ho and a bottle of dumb!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.......zzzzzzzzzzz....zzzzzzzzzzzz....

 

 

Last edited on Jun 01, 2008



I_thumb_down Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest is not recommended by williampinn

9
helpful
votes
Did you find this review helpful?
 
 
Review inappropriate? Copyright violation?



add williampinn to my friends list add to my favorites subscribe to feed

I_comment_shdw24 Comments about williampinn’s Review

 


williampinn wrote on Jun 20, 2008 at 1:43PM

In response to PattyTherre's comment from Jun 8, 2008 at 10:46PM:

More? I don't think I could sit through that film again. LOL!

PattyTherre wrote on Jun 8, 2008 at 10:46PM

That was too funny. More, more!!

mrkstvns wrote on Jun 4, 2008 at 10:41AM

Ah, Willy....you crack me up, Dude!

williampinn wrote on Jun 2, 2008 at 1:27PM

In response to MikeMaroon's comment from Jun 2, 2008 at 1:09PM:

A pus-filled boil is definitely an improvement.

MikeMaroon wrote on Jun 2, 2008 at 1:09PM

These Pirates of the Caribbean movies are a little over-the-top, but I tend to enjoy them. But then, I enjoy pus-filled boils. Thanks for another perspective!

kid-kansas wrote on Jun 1, 2008 at 5:45PM

In response to williampinn's comment from Jun 1, 2008 at 5:39PM:

;)

williampinn wrote on Jun 1, 2008 at 5:41PM

In response to Fardreamer's comment from Jun 1, 2008 at 3:21PM:

I'm always a sucker for a pirate movie. I truly am. Boy do I feel stupid. This film will lower your IQ 50 points, I swear!

williampinn wrote on Jun 1, 2008 at 5:39PM

In response to kid-kansas's comment from Jun 1, 2008 at 12:54PM:

If you try to gather anything from this film, you'll hurt yourself. LOL!

Fardreamer wrote on Jun 1, 2008 at 3:21PM

William, I have only seen the first one and that's as far as I'm willing to go into the franchise. From what I gather, this one and its follow-up are really dull and overlong.

kid-kansas wrote on Jun 1, 2008 at 12:54PM

I gather it just was not your cup of tea(Rum) ;)

5 star rating
"Met my expectations and left me begging for more!!!"
More Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest reviews
5 star rating
"Dead man's chest is one of my favorites!"



More reviews by williampinn
add williampinn to my friends list

4 star ratingRapa Nui Review - "Who Will Be Your Birdman?!"
5 star ratingInvision Power Board Review - "You're not gonna believe this: I found a...
3 star ratingThe Science Forum Review - "Children of the Corn! Thank God For the...
1 star ratingcarbon dioxide Review - "A bogus greenhouse gas."
reviews by williampinn »
view more in Movies & DVDs view more in Movies & TV