GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra Review

When I saw the initial trailer for G.I. Joe, I initially dismissed it.  I thought it was going to be an utter failure and it looked like absolute crap.  I hated the idea that the Joes were not "Real American Heroes" but rather the best of the best from different countries from around the world.  I hated the idea that Joseph Gordon Levitt was going to be playing Cobra Commander.  I really hated that Marlon Wayans was going to be playing Ripcord.  I was absolutely ready to hate G.I. Joe with every fiber of my geeky being. 

I am most pleased to say, I was wrong.

Allow me to put things into perspective.  I am a huge G.I. Joe fan.  If there was one toy that I had more of than my precious Star Wars figures, and my Captain Power, it was G.I. Joe.  I don't mean the twelve inch figures either.  I mean the 3 ¾ "figures.  I had tons of them; mountains of them.  So many that I simply didn't know what to do with them.  You get the idea.  I watched the TV show religiously.  I knew all the characters by name what that they were individually capable of. G.I. Joe fighting the enemy that was known as Cobra was my bread and butter.  I was and still am a G.I. Joe fan.

In anticipation of the movie, I bought the first half of the first season of the TV show.  I absorbed those four discs in a matter of two days.  I came to a realization, some of the stories were awful.  In fact, the major offender was a series called "The Pyramid of Darkness" in which our heroes are enslaved by some genetically enhanced creatures called "Fatal Fluffies."  That particular storyline represented the shark being jumped, run over with the boat, shot, stabbed, and stuffed into a fridge and systematically nuked into oblivion.  There was simply no way that the live action G.I. Joe movie could be that bad. 

I am most pleased to say now that I was right. 

Be warned, I will be delving into spoilers a bit here.  Not too much but a few.  Stephen Sommers has an eye for making action movies that can be classified as insane.  Watch Deep Rising or The Mummy to see what I am talking about.  G.I. Joe for Mr. Sommers is the work of a master playing with some really cool toys.  It is that good for his caliber of movie.  It is Deep Rising good.  I found G.I. Joe to be an incredibly fun time at the movies.

I won't bother trying to describe the story.  Let's face it, G.I. Joe the cartoon always revolved on the use of a mcguffin, the fight for that object, one of the heroes getting captured, a daring rescue with the heroes saving the day while the bad guys escape to fight another day.  This movie is absolutely no exception only this time it is done on a much grander scale. 

The acting is across the board tacky.   That said, everyone is clearly having a blast with the script and it is evident in the proceedings.  I will say however, in an inspired bit of geek dream casting, Ray Park as Snake Eyes is grade A awesome and badass all wrapped up in a suit that inexplicably has a mouth and nose sculpted into the face mask.  Dennis Quaid as General hawk was a great choice. Brendan Fraser in a cameo as Flint (Yes! It was Flint!) was a welcome addition to the movie.  Here's hoping he comes back in the sequel in a much bigger capacity.  Christopher Eccleston as Destro was fun in the role as was surprising enough Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Cobra Commander.  Yeah they were extremely over the top but I found them to be rather oddly entertaining.  Rachel Nichols as Scarlett was really nice to look at.  It was a shame that she was not given enough to do in this movie.  I would have liked to see more of her.  Sienna Miller as the Baroness was quite good and she made very good use of the vast amount of screen time that she received.  Plus it doesn't hurt that she looks great in tight black leather.

Did I hate anything? I hated the overuse of flashbacks in the movie.  There were points that I was just saying enough already.  Also the lack of use of some of the more popular Joes like Roadblock and Shipwreck was a little upsetting.  Also the addition of the relationship between Duke and the Baroness and Cobra Commander felt a little forced but I am supposing it was better than the alternative which was to have Cobra Commander be part of a race called Cobra La.  Channing Tatum has a good look for the hero role.  However, he just played moody and brooding all the time.  Marlon Wayans fared a little better but only a little.

Ultimately, would I recommend G.I.Joe? Absolutely.  If you are a fan of the toys, this will make you feel like a kid again.  It is a tremendous amount of fun and the action just does not stop.  If you are not a fan of the toys and the cartoon or even the comic book, stay away. There is a clear affection for the source material from the filmmakers and it shows on screen.  I am hoping there will be a sequel and soon.

YO JOE!

A very enthusiastic G.I. Joe Lovin' 4 out of 5