Crest Pro-Health Rinse Review

First, some facts:

What's In It

Crest Pro-Health toothpaste is classified as a toothpaste by the FDA, AMA, and probably Poison Control (because it is not paint thinner, although you may start to believe it is by the end of this review). It's of a normal toothpaste-like consistency, and is a sort of gel, blue, with little white specs in it.

Ingredient wise, the active ingredient is: Stannous flouride 0.454% for 'anticavity, antigingivitis, antisensitivity'. I believe this is some sort of new ingredient. The inactive ingredient list contains your typical silica's and phosphates (and polyethylenes...yay!).

What it Claims and Does

Unlike scouring powder, Crest Pro Health toothpaste is minty, and you can brush your teeth without gagging. Initial results from it after a highly scientific 'tongue-test' (feel teeth with tongue) it also seems to clean teeth about as effectively as any other toothpaste. It also claims to be a whitener, and de-sensitizer (both of which I need).

Whitener

As a whitener, I didn't notice much difference in the color of my teeth after about a week of use. Granted this is probably too short a period to tell anything, plus it wasn't a straight week (I tried it on and off). Additionally my teeth weren't stained (which some people claim happens), but I did not notice any change in color good or bad in that short period of time.

De-sensitzer

I have very sensitive teeth (luckily my teeth can't read, or this statement would surely upset them), so I'll take anything to toughen up the lil' chompers. When I heard that Pro-Health claimed to do that as well, it was my primary reason for wanting to try it (in addition to my dentist recommending it). Unfortunately, I may never know if it really works well for that, as I was barely able to use it for a week.

A Cure Worse than the Disease

While you probably want something strong in a toothpaste in order to kill off the germs in your mouth (I've seen germs in mouthwash commercials.  They're pretty ugly as cartoons), you do not want Rambo who is willing to accept collateral damage as part of the job. Here, the innocent bystander is your mouth, and there are two primary casualties you may suffer with this stuff:

The first and most immediate side-effect (yes, a side effect from toothpaste) is that it literally tears your mouth up. Even after my first brushing, within 5 minutes of rinsing I began to notice what felt like a slimy, stringy, film on the inside of your mouth. I rinsend again, but it would not go away. Eventually I found that the only thing that works to remove the stringy accumulations in your mouth is a paper towel, a napkin, or your finger. These things must be swept through your mouth to remove the strings. After a while, you'll realize that this filmy substance is not from the toothpaste, it's from your mouth. This paste actually does something to the inside of your mouth which causes a layer of skin to peel off. This skin shedding can last up to an hour. In fact, you may decide you can deal with it initially, but after a while it just gets very annoying, especially when you're out of the house, on your way to work in the morning, or even before going to bed (Wife: kiss you? No thanks.) Plus, put plainly, it's just 'gross'. And no, it doesn't seem to go away after repeated brushing (although it does become reduced, probably because you have less skin to shed!)

Second: The Joker Effect. After a few days of brushing with Crest Pro-Health and swabbing your mouth to remove the murded skin cells, you may also notice that it's not just the inside of your mouth this toothpaste is affecting. I began to notice that on the outside corners of my mouth I was developing a slight discoloration. It was kind of like when you drank red Kool-Aid as a kid. You'd get red on the sides of your mouth as a badge of honor. Unfortunately while Kool-Aide washes off, this does not. I can imagine that if I used it long enough, I would begin to look like I had a permanent smile (or perhaps frown since it drips down a bit), much like the Joker in Batman. What's worse, like the Joker's smile, I was beginning to worry that it would be permanent. It actually took almost a month after I quit using Pro-Health for the tint to go away. Even now, many months later, I swear I can still see a slight hint of pink there at the sides of my lips.

Conclusion? To quote every 13-year-old girl in America: OMG (Oh My G*d), it's Sooo Gross!!

Why use toothpaste with this many side-effects? It's simple: don't. This stuff really isn't worth the hassle of wiping up your skin after using it, or the risk of getting permanent fruit-punch mouth stains. Plus, as mentioned, one of the warnings on the box that they *do* mention (unlike the others) is possible 'surface staining of the teeth'. While I did not experience this, for a 'Pro-Health' toothpaste with whitening to potentially cause staining, not to mention what I did notice, I don't really know why it's still on the market. Apparently some people do not experience these phenomena (although I've read a lot of Internet forums that mention it), but why take the risk? There are plenty of other products out there that won't risk mascara-mouth or treat your oral cavity as an extra in a slasher movie.