CHANTIX Review

well i am now very HAPPY and PROUD =] to say that I am 6 weeks smoke free !! but NOT with Chantix. I'm on the patch. But I did try Chantix a few months ago (May 2009) to be exact. I heard about it.. My bf kept bugging me to quit I figured i'll give it a shot maybe i'll get lucky and it will help me kick this disgusting habit that I can't seem to handle doing on my own. The first few days were okay.. I was just really happy and proud of myself for taking that huge step. I was still smoking cigs bc you're supposed to smoke for like 7days on it I think it was? But anyways after  a few days I became extremely tired and angry all the time.. I did nothing at all but sleep and cry. and i was STILL smoking. It was NOT withdrawls. I couldn't stand being around anyone..  not even my bf who made me (and still does =]) the happiest girl in the world. I had no desire to do anything...at all. except cry and sleep and hate myself. and i have no history of depression at all. it became so bad that i didnt know who i was i couldnt stand to look in the mirror and i felt like i wasnt in my body..just watching myself ..it was the weirdest and scariest feeling ever.. like nohting was real...just there... once i started the second week (the bigger dose)i got reallly sick from it and then kept wanting to kill myself like i really wanted to die. ive NEVER felt like that. and i was STILL smoking!! i hadnt lost my cigs. I looked it up online and found all these people feeling the same way and was SO HAPPY lol bc i wasnt alone i threw out those meds and about 2 days later i was back to MY NORMAL SELF! i wish someone would have warned me about all this. if i didnt stop i probably would have lost a lot of friends n maybe even my bf bc i hated everyone and was so evil and had no hope for anything...i kept messing up at work i was just out of my head completely .. i know everyones different but i just want to share and help if anyone is feeling like this.. GET OFF THEM. and if you really want to quit, try the patch ! it cost me a total of 160 dollars for 8 weeks of patches. 80 a month. thats what i spent on cigs. im proud of myself and very HAPPY to be a nonsmoker and on my way back to being healthy and making my family happy and not worry anymore ! i thought i NEEDED cigs..they were my everything..my best friend... i didn't know how to say goodbye or live without them... but goodbye cancer i'd rather have my LIFE over a ciggarette. i get one life i'm not having it end with lung cancer and suffering that's nothing good to remember ! i know quitting is hard... VERY HARD.. if anyone needs help or support i am here!! and hey i need the extra support every once in a while too it's nice to know i'm not alone ! since none of my friends would quit with me lol. xoxo<3