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| Cons |
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A Two-Minute Play, set at HQ of a large cellphone service provider.........
Ann: What should we do to people who sign a one- or two-year contract?
Damien: Ah, sell 'em a crappy phone at a big discount. That way, they'll get so frustrated, they'll buy a replacement for hundreds of dollars!
Blackbeard: Great idea - that'll create exorbitant profits and bonuses for us!
Lucifer: And let's save a little more by eliminating almost all the seating from the retail stores. Make customers who are waiting for help just wander around on concrete floors with cheap carpeting, and look at expensive phones.
Ratchet: Be sure to train all the customer reps to never apologize, either. We shouldn't admit any wrongdoing - especially when phones fail, or accounts get totally screwed up.
Ridler: "Dropped calls? Um, I'm going on lunch break. Someone else will help you."
(guffaws)
Stiffler: If a customer wants a discount on a replacement phone because they blew their one-time discount on the crappy phone, let's tell them they haven't earned an "upgrade" yet.
Cain: Yeah, and tell the reps to act like they don't know this customer has already renewed a contract with us once before. After all, we had a different name then.
Joker: Oh my gosh, let's change our name AGAIN!........BACK to what it was BEFORE!...... so no one can blame us any more. We can just play dumb! And keep switching the name back and forth! (room erupts into gales of laughter)
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The friendly folks at Radio Shack got me out of my "crappy phone" jam. (See my review.) You can bet I'll be reading other people's Viewpoints when my current contract is finally up.
Bottom Line: Libby Loathes It.
Last edited on Apr 30, 2007
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